A Rocky Relationship
by Scriptpony
Summary: A romantic love triangle that is quite metamorphic if I do say so myself. A comedic crackfic filled to the brim with rock puns, or at least will be soon enough.


A Rocky Relationship

Chapter 1

Rarity sat in her room sewing a wedding dress for a client in Canterlot. Ever since the Grand Galloping Gala she began to question her love life. For as long as she could remember she had a crush on the prince, just for him to turn out to be a…_jerk_. It was farfetched and admirably stupid to think she would become a member of the royal family and have a happy ending. Not to say she was particularly sad about the events at the gala, it was just that she wasn't _in love_ anymore. _In love? _Was that how she felt all this time about a stallion she never met? She let out a long sigh. Sweetie Belle opened up the door behind her.

"Hey sis, whatcha doin?" She said, snapping her sister out of her bemused state.

"Just sewing a dress. Same as pretty much any other day." Rarity said with a moan. She was surprised how she felt about her occupation that split second, as if bored of it.

Sweetie Belle stepped forward "Um…are you feeling okay sis?" She said in a concerned tone.

"I am quite alright darling." She replied, feeling as though she was telling a white lie. She wasn't "alright" she was_ content_. No not content, more like content sadness.

"Well…uh Pinkie Pie gave you this invitation; I told her you were busy." Sweetie Belle pulled an envelope out of her saddle bag with her mouth and dropped it on to the table Rarity was sitting at. Rarity levitated a pair of sewing scissors and the envelope, and sliced the latter open. She let the envelope drop back on to the table and placed the scissors do the same, but guided by her horn. Rarity unfolded the paper and began to read it:

_Pinkie Pie's welcome to Ponyville Party!_

_Hi __**Rarity**__, it's me Pinkie Pie! You're invited to a very big party at Sugar Cube Corner tomorrow! Just so you don't forget, here is the information I told you!_

_Time: 12:00 am_

_Place: Sugar Cube Corner of course silly!_

_Dress code: Nothing! You don't need to wear anything!_

_Sincerely, your bestest friend,_

_Pinkie Pie_

Rarity levitated the invitation back on to the table and began to think again. Maybe she could meet a stallion at the party; she never really paid much attention to stallions in Ponyville, though they defiantly paid attention to her. Rarity threw her front right hoof into the air and held an overjoyed expression on her face, memories of stallion's faces run rampant through her mind, and she began to single one out. As she did, a familiar voice rang behind her.

"Uh sis…I am gonna…uh go back home." Sweetie Belle said nonchalantly. Rarity shyly descended back into her chair as her sister left the room. Once the door's creaking stopped, Rarity confidently declared to herself:

"Tomorrow, I am going to get a coltfriend"

_The next day_

Rarity confidently stepped into Sugar Cube Corner at 12:01 sharp, her definition of fashionably late, expecting everypony to double take at her beautiful bedazzling purple dress she was wearing, but instead no one paid any real attention to her entrance. Unfazed by the perfectly normal behavior, Rarity walked over to Pinkie Pie who was talking to Twilight Sparkle. Rarity overheard their conversation as she walked towards them, much less eavesdropping and more mannerly, it would be terribly unladylike to announce her entrance across the room and interrupt their conversation.

"So, who is the new pony moving to Ponyville?" Twilight asked Pinkie.

"Ooh! He's an old friend of mine, he is running a bit late though, but it's okay! Oh and he's not exactly a pony…" Pinkie enthusiastically replied.

"Oh? Is he a zebra?" Twilight asked.

"Nope he's a-" Pinkie said interrupted by the entry of a rather large boulder.

"Who would bring a rock to a par-"Twilight said, interrupted by Pinkie Pie's excited squeal.

"**Rocky!"** She shouted, and began to sprint towards the boulder and gave it a friendly embrace whilst Twilight stood dumbfounded with her ears dropped down.

"Wha…he's…a rock?" She said to herself. Rarity turned around and saw Pinkie hugging the rock. Rarity felt strange, much stranger than the fact her friend was hugging a rock, that was normal by Pinkie Pie's standards, but Rarity had felt something much different…_love._

"Pinkie Pie! It's good to see you." Rocky said less than enthusiastically. "But can you let go? I can't breathe."

"Haha Rocky you **crag **me up, you _can't_ breathe!" Pinkie said.

"Well still, it's not very **pelite **to squeeze me so hard" Rocky replied. Rarity stepped forward and asked:

"Hi Pinkie Pie…who's your…friend?" Pinkie Pie cringed instantaneously, usually that specific tone along with that specific phrase meant something very specific. Pinkie thought that for once she had found somepo- someon- some..thing that took her seriously, and something that she fell in love with. She though no one else would ever share her feelings, much less one of her best friends. Pinkie snapped out of her deep thought and answered her question:

"He is from the rock farm I used to work at when I was a filly…we've been friends for a long time…" Pinkie said, sheepishly shying away from her embrace.  
>"You look…familiar…" Rocky said. The words "dumb" and "rock" echoed in his mind. Rarity looked just as shocked as Rocky…if he had a face that is.<p>

"You're…dumb rock…" Rarity said, stating the obvious nervously.

"Actually…I consider myself to be quite well educated…"Rocky replied. All of the party was at an awkward standstill. It wasn't everyday a talking rock moved into Ponyville.

"But…how….you…blew up?" Rarity said, and just had the realization of the danger of the sonic rainboom, it was capable of splitting solid stone after all, who knows what effect it could have on a pony.

"Yeah…I…didn't necessarily enjoy the part where you ripped my insides out and used them on a dress…but…" Rocky said.

"But…you…"Rarity said, trying to escape the boiling pot of awkwardness the conversation was, to no avail. Pinkie jumped between them.

"Well! It's nice to know you two know…each other…but…uh…maybe …" Pinkie said, and was pushed away by Rarity

"I'm…so…sorry about…well everything…" Rarity said knowing she would need to if she ever wanted to further her relationship with Rocky.

"It's…okay…" Tom said, and Rarity let out a sigh of relief.

"So…how long are you staying in Ponyville?" Rarity asked. Rocky began to answer, but Pinkie interrupted him.

"For…ever." She said, and the realization set in to each of them was that they might form a romantic relationship with him and also that they were considering a romantic relationship with a boulder, Pinkie Pie less so than Rarity.

"Well…in that case I can see us becoming very close…_friends_, now that we put that behind us." Said Rarity, stepping closer to Rocky.

"I think I can too." Replied Rocky.

"A rock? That's my destiny? Grrrrrr….dumb rock!" Rarity shouted. Rocky kept to his thoughts, who knew how somepony would react to a talking rock, much less one declaring their love to them and complimenting them on their beauty. And then the rainboom happened.

Author's note:

I never thought I would work on a crackfic, but boredom and lack of will to make sense overwhelmed me, so I was in no shape to work on my more serious fic, which I got 1000~ words done, but I think it needs more. This on the other hand will be about 5~ chapters. Also incase you haven't noticed I will be putting all the rock puns in bold, trust me I've got a lot of them, some are really neat so I want to make them **boulder** just so they don't go over your heads.


End file.
